We all are guilty of posting shiny vacation highlights, the curated moments for friends & family (innocently leaving the messy stuff behind). Even if that poolside selfie was followed by heat exhaustion or food poisoning. Perhaps that viral restaurant didn’t live up to the hype or something iconic didn’t resonate with you (and that’s ok!) Honestly, our most memorable trips are the ones where the itinerary was flawed, where we took wrong turns and we had to pivot in the moment. Stories are created out of all the moments. The messy. The rushed. The unexpected. I doubt anyone seeks travel perfection. That sounds dull.
Cobblestone Conundrums in Amsterdam
With Van Gogh’s golden sunflowers in my mind’s eye we were a short stroll from our hotel when I stepped into an uneven divot of old cobblestones, falling hard on the sidewalk. The crunch from my ankle was echoing in my ears as I processed what happened before pain took over. A local woman stopped to help me muttering “welcome to Amsterdam and the damn sidewalks”.
My spectacle elicited a few gasps. Brian helped me sit up on a nearby stoop. I was holding back deep sobs trying to feign embarrassment but more so worried I had broken my ankle. I blubbered through the hotel lobby. My poor husband tried to convince me it was not that bad. See for yourself it was that bad. I have never seen a more swollen ankle.
Being that this accident happened on our second day in Amsterdam our imagined itinerary started to fade into wherever best laid plans go to die. What did this mean for ticking the Tulips of the Netherlands off my bucket list? It didn’t happen. The Tulips remain on the list.
The pivot: we became quickly acquainted with the public transportation. Amsterdam has some of the cleanest and efficient above ground tram systems! We took a boat tour to see the city from the canals (no walking required!). When we visited museums I would find a bench and truly study the art around me. The pain in my ankle forced me to slow down, take in the moment and stay still.
A Case of Food Poisoning in Scotland
On our overnight flight to Scotland Brian suffered an intense case of food poisoning from what he attributed to the airline salad. For the duration, he had to slide past a wee woman knitting, on her return home, to rush to the bathroom. I had taken a sleep aid oblivious to what transpired. Upon landing and removing my sleep mask the green sickly creature seated to my left filled me in.
Needless to say in his zombie-like state, I was on my own in terms of getting us from the airport to the rental car company. An old timey coupe taxi, a train and a bit of walking later I was behind the wheel of our rental car ready to head out on our multi-city road trip. I was hyper focused on driving on the opposite side of the road and adjusting to the opposite side of the car that the incessant beep emitted from the car was distracting. Nothing on the gauges indicated anything was wrong. With a sick passenger I was fixated on getting to our AirBnB. An hour into the drive the beeping had not stopped and Brian needed somewhere to pull over. As he rushed into a rest stop, I inspected the car, as soon as I stepped outside I could smell the car was hot. Like burnt rubber. Looking at the center console — the emergency brake was engaged. The whole drive. We were lucky it didn’t cause any damage.
My cell service went from sporadic to non-existent (despite having upgraded to global data) and we had to use the wifi at a local garden center to get the directions from an unimpressed AirBnB host who had expected our arrival long before. Upon arrival Brian immediately went to the nearest bedroom to sleep it off. The only food we had were protein bars and biscoff cookies from the plane. My nerves were shot from the drive. I felt alone in the romantic setting of this little cottage overlooking a rolling horse pasture. Too frazzled to drive into the town at night alone in search of food or drinks, I built a fire and drank the milk the host left for us.
The next morning Brian rallied, the color returned to his face. Despite how the Scottish highlands trip began we both consider the overall trip one of our best. It was my first time driving in a foreign country, which ignited our love for having the freedom and flexibility to have multiple destinations on a road trip. It’s a model we repeat on nearly all our vacations.
Lessons learned? You would assume Brian would avoid airline salads - but he is a rebel and continues to risk it. On the other hand I always have an eSim downloaded and enabled, ready for use immediately when we land, so we are never stranded without service. The other app I highly recommend is Welcome Pickups. We have booked a driver using this app several times abroad it is a sure fire way to eliminate the stress of getting out of the airport and into your vacation. They guarantee the driver monitors your flight details and will wait up to an hour free! You can also choose your return to the airport with the same driver, it’s a comfort element that is easily completed through the app. Final pro tip, always check your emergency brake before driving off!
Let’s Be Real - Sh*t happens
Despite feeling prepared by your endless research, review reading and pinning the universe has the the last say. When we booked our honeymoon we were new to travel planning. Vacationing our way through Rome, Florence and the magic of Venice seemed like a no brainer even if we did book for the first week of July. I mean don’t most people simply book their honeymoon a week or two following their nuptials? The heat should have been a consideration. It wasn’t! We were happy (we were dumb).
After naively posing with two gladiator cosplayers, who demanded 40 euros from Brian, we had the shame of falling for a tourist trap. Though the sour feeling quickly dissipated when the iconic Roman Coliseum came into view. In awe of experiencing the sheer size of the coliseum and soaking in the history, we made our way to the famous Spanish Steps. Which happened to be under restoration, therefore were blocked by plexiglass barriers. Our romantic notion of eating gelato perched on the steps overlooking the plaza were dashed. I mean we still had gelato!
Walking back to our hotel we were approached by two men offering free friendship bracelets, one grabbed my wrist and quickly tied one on. It all happened so quickly. Then they wanted money from Brian. I tried giving it back. They held up their hands as if to say it’s yours now. With persistence, we were able remove ourselves from the situation. Panic set it. Were we suckers? From then on no matter what we were offered we refused (even if it wasn’t a scam). We dialed down the Midwest Nice.
The lesson, iconic landmarks don't pause their maintenance schedule for your love story, and "friendly" street performers aren't volunteers. Always check local tourism boards or crowd-sourced forums (like TripAdvisor or Reddit) a month before your trip to see if major sights are under scaffolding. Establish a firm, smiling "No, thank you" for street vendors, and keep walking. You do not have to be on ‘high alert’ just not so approachable. Not all folks selling are scammers, like the man selling bottled water for one euro we should not have ignored (we had heat exhaustion after all) but hey the gladiator photo as corny as it is makes us laugh.
The Silver Lining of Sideways Travel
Looking back, the silly mistakes and the midnight stomach betrayals are the moments Brian and I laugh about the most. When you are in the thick of a travel mishap, it feels like you have no idea what you are doing. Your ankle is busted, your stomach is turning, or your romantic expectations are sitting behind a sheet of plexiglass.
But here is the ultimate takeaway: perfectly smooth trips are great for pretty pictures, but messy trips teach you who you really are. If you can survive getting lost in the heat of July without snapping or can laugh when a pigeon poops on you (Brian) you will be more prepared for when the unexpected finds you.
Travel isn’t about executing a flawless itinerary; it’s about your ability to pivot, laugh at the absurdity of the situation, and find a garden center to poach their wifi. The next time the universe throws a wrench into your travel plans, take a deep breath, pack the Pepto-Bismol, and remind yourself: we will laugh about this one day…
Now, go book the trip. Just maybe check the landmark restoration schedule first.
